Grief, Gratitude, and Growth: Navigating Memorial Day With Care

    Memorial Day: a long weekend filled with cookouts and the unofficial arrival of summer. It’s a great time to enjoy time off of work; however, it’s important to remember why we have designated this day a holiday.

    At its heart, Memorial Day holds deep emotional weight. It’s a time to honor and remember those who have died while serving in the military. For many, this day stirs more than just patriotic reflection. It opens the door to complex emotions, grief, trauma, and quiet resilience.

    I want to take a moment to acknowledge the layers that exist beneath the surface. Behind the parades, flags, and parties, there are stories of sacrifice, loss, survival, and continued healing.

    For families of fallen service members, Memorial Day can be a difficult reminder of absence. Grief doesn’t follow a straight path, and while time might soften the sharpness of loss, it doesn’t erase it. This holiday can bring grief back to the forefront in an unexpected and intense way.

    It’s okay to feel that grief. Grieving is a human response to love and loss.

    Memorial Day can also be a complicated day for veterans and active service members. For some, it brings memories of comrades lost. These memories can bring up feelings of survivor’s guilt, unresolved trauma, or spiritual dissonance.

    If you’re a veteran and struggling this weekend, please know you are not alone. You do not have to carry the weight of remembrance in silence. Reaching out to a therapist, peer support group, or crisis line is not a sign of weakness. It is an act of strength and self-preservation.

    There’s no “right” way to experience Memorial Day. For some, it will be a day of laughter and sunlight. For others, it will be a day of quiet remembrance or emotional reckoning. Most of us live somewhere in between holding space for appreciation and sorrow.

    What matters is that we allow ourselves to show up honestly. That we give ourselves (and others) the permission to feel what needs to be felt without judgment.

    Here are a few ways we can take care of our mental health and honor this day with intention:

• Check in with yourself. Ask, “How am I really feeling today? What do I need?”
• Reach out. Whether it’s a friend, a therapist, or a support, connection matters.
• Create rituals of remembrance. Light a candle, write a letter, visit a memorial — whatever helps you express what you’re holding inside.
• Set boundaries. You don’t have to attend every gathering or explain your grief. Your peace is valid.
• Hold compassion. For yourself, for others, and for those navigating loss or memory this weekend.

    Memorial Day is more than a day off. It’s a day that carries emotional significance for millions. Let us remember those who gave their lives, and let us also care for the living, especially those carrying invisible scars.

    To all who mourn, to all who remember, and to all who serve: we see you. Your pain matters. Your healing matters.