Living with Chronic Illness

    There are times in life where you won't do your best. There are times where, no matter how hard you try, you will fail. It's okay, it's just the way life goes. You have to accept it, forgive yourself, and move on.

    For example: I didn't write anything for the past two weeks. My goal is to post once a week. There's no shortage of things to write about, it's definitely not that I've run out of ideas. I've just been so tired that it felt impossible. ... well, maybe it didn't just feel impossible, it was impossible.

     I have narcolepsy, a condition where I fall asleep during the day because I don't get restful sleep at night. It's been suspected for at least three years now and hasn't been properly medicated yet, but more on that some other time. Every time I think I've gotten used to the way life is now, I get blindsided. Somehow, it gets worse. Somehow, I'm even more tired than I usually am. Somehow, it's so much that I can't handle it, even though I used to be able to handle living like this every day.

    Work completely wipes me out. My job now is fairly easy - I do much less work than I have done in the past. A normal amount of work, my boss calls it. I can make it through the week but basically crash out on the weekends. It is so hard to do the things that need done around the house. Mr. Plant-Powered Therapist is amazing and handles most of it for me.

    I could be upset with myself for failing to post once a week. I could blame myself. At the end of the day though, what good would that do? It wasn't that I didn't want to, it's that I wasn't able to. I am practicing giving myself grace. Just because I cannot do what I used to do does not mean that I am worth any less. Things didn't work out today? Try again tomorrow. And if that doesn't work? Keep trying. Don't give up.

    Love yourself, even the parts you don't like. Give yourself grace and be gentle with yourself. It's certainly a hard task but it is something we could all benefit from doing. 

 

If you're interested in reading more about chronic illness, check out my post on what people don't tell you about having chronic illness.

 

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